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A friend of mine who works and lives in Berkeley injured her shoulder yesterday. She does not have health insurance. Can you recommend where she might go to have it looked at? And/or acupuncture…

Is a walk through the yellow pages the only reasonable way?

Beaner is selling her beautiful home in Monroe New Jersey and moving to sunny Florida! Darn, it’s right on a golf course, and she keeps the place impecably. The pictures in this little Flash video actually don’t do it justice. It really is a beautiful home, so you should live there!

Watch a short video about the house

Surprise! I went to Yosemite on Sunday with Binka’s relatives. It was pretty awesome.

We scrambled up to the base of El Capitan from the valley floor. It was maybe a 30 minute scramble over a mix of easy forest terrain, steep hills, and, giant steep boulders! It was pretty terrific.

Boulder Scramble, We're almost there!

Touching El Capitan

Looking up at El Capitan from the base

This has been sitting in a dark corner of my computer for years. I just came across it again and…. well, it’s completely immature but I love it. Without further adieu: The Top 10 sexy lines from Star Wars
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10) “Get in there you big furry oaf, I don’t care what you smell!”
9) “Luke, at that speed do you think you’ll be able to pull out in
time?”
8) “Put that thing away before you get us all killed.”
7) “You’ve got something jammed in here real good.”
6) “Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”
5) “You came in that thing? You’re braver than I thought.”
4) “Sorry about the mess…”
3) “Look at the size of that thing!”
2) “Curse my metal body, I wasn’t fast enough!”
1) “She may not look like much, but she’s got it where it counts, kid.”

TOP 10 SEXY LINES FROM THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK
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10) “I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me.”
9) “Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?”
8) “There’s an awful lot of moisture in here.”
7) “But now we must eat. Come, good food, come…”
6) “That’s okay, I’d like to keep it on manual control for a while.”
5) Hurry up, golden-rod…”
4) “I must’ve hit it pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up
like that, huh kid?”
3) “Possible he came in through the south entrance.”
2) “And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!”
1) “Control, control! You must learn control!”

TOP 10 SEXY LINES FROM RETURN OF THE JEDI
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10) “Hey, point that thing someplace else.”
9) “I look forward to completing your training. In time you will call
me master.”
8) “You’re a jittery little thing, aren’t you?”
7) “I never knew I had it in me.”
6) “Someone must’ve told them about my little maneuver at the battle of
Taanab.”
5) “There is good in him, I’ve felt it.”
4) “I assure you, Lord Vader, my men are working as fast as they can.”
“Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them.”
3) “Grab me, Chewie. I’m slipping – hold on. Grab it, almost… you
almost got it. Gently now, all right, easy, easy, hold me, Chewie.
Chewie!”
2) “Hey, Luke, thanks for coming after me – now I owe you one.”
1) “Back door, huh? Good idea!”

Happy Cheese Weasel Day to one and all!

local version:

How do I tell if an Android program is stealing my data?

For example, here’s what I can find out about “Tank Hero”. It has been downloaded more than 250,000 times and gotten 28,000 ratings, mostly very good. The program gets “Full internet access” and “Modify or delete SD card contents”. So it has permission to look through the contents of most of my phone… and upload it to their server. The game maker has listed a website, Clapfoot Games with precious little information. The game is free. There are a lot of programs like this in the Android Marketplace.

When looking for bad things, you can often “follow the money”. If a deal seems too good to be true, it is. If an Android app is free, well, it’s not, you just don’t know it yet. It’s good that I see ads in the Tank Hero game, but that isn’t enough.

On a multitude of online forum posts, people keep saying “Oh don’t worry about it, I haven’t found malware yet.” The problem with that logic is that I see no mechanism for discovering and notifying the public about malware.

I looked at the antivirus programs that are out for the Android and they haven’t gotten good reviews yet.

So what am I to do? How do I tell if an Android program is stealing my data?

If you are interested in any of these upcoming (awesome) classes, give me a buzz, or just sign up!

Spring Kinetics classes are starting up at the Crucible in Oakland, starting April 9th. Most classes are 1 night a week 6-9pm for 5 weeks. One class is on Saturdays. Space is limited and classes are starting in just 2 weeks! If you’re into it, sign up this week.

* Introduction to Mechanical Sculpture
* Electromechanics for Everything
* Arduino Microcontrollers: Building Smart Art
* Flame Effect for Art
* Electronics for Artists

Read full class descriptions
See class schedules

Each teacher is an expert in their field. I’ll let the teachers tell you about their classes:

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Introduction to Mechanical Sculpture
taught by Ben Cowden (http://benjamincowden.com)

Next month a new group of students will be introduced to the wonderful world of mechanical sculpture. I hope you will join us as we learn about gears, cams, levers, and worm drives. If you want to integrate movement into your artwork, or just want to build some crazy contraptions, this is a great way to get started. There is no experience required, but feel free to bring project ideas and sketches for group problem-solving and brainstorm. Classes are Mondays 6-9pm starting April 11th. Check out the description here and sign up! (https://store.thecrucible.org/index.php?main_page=index&cPath=415_442_542)

Sincerely,
Ben Cowden

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Electromechanics for Everything
taught by Rich Humphrey, obselete and discarded technology expert

This class gives you the ability to make things move, controlling art using non-computer means. Mechanically or electrically, with cams and gears or motors and relays.
This class is perfect if you have an interesting problem to solve, want to know how modern machines work, you have art to make, or a contraption that needs to see the light of day.

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Arduino Microcontrollers: Building Smart Art
taught by Rich Humphrey (http://richhumphrey.net)

Learn how to interface between the software and physical world, have your machine be able to react to inputs from the real world. Make your art smart! If you have art or a gizmo that needs to come alive, start here.

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Flame Effect for Art
taught by Lee Sonko and Liam McNamara

Possibly the best part of this class is that you get to bring home your final project. Yes, you bring home a flame thrower*. Maybe it’s giant, maybe it’s tiny. Both are awesome. Learning how to work with flame effects safely will open up so many possibilities for art and exploration.

* Not technically a “flame thrower” by the rules and laws, but we’ll cover that.

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Electronics for Artists
taught by Steve Widmark (http://www.paleoneon.com)

My name is Steve Widmark and I teach a class at The Crucible in Oakland called “Electronics for Artists.” If you’ve ever wanted to know how to design and build electronic circuits to make a gadget or a piece of interactive art, then this is the class for you. You’ll learn electronics by making a small project (a cyber pet or a small kinetic sculpture) that uses a PICAXE microcontroller as its “brain.” Along the way you’ll be taught basic electronic theory, schematic reading, use of solderless breadboards for prototyping, circuit board fabrication and microcontroller programming. This is a beginning course designed for students with little or no experience with electronics. Class starts Saturday, April 9th. For more details, visit www.thecrucible.org

Come visit a sumptuous, strange, and beautiful world for six minutes and twenty seconds.

by Jason Mongue

local version:

Watch this twice, then share with a friend.

I noticed mention of Diesel Exhaust Fluid in a Northern Tool catalog. Apparently, there’s a new emissions reduction technology that is being implemented that reduces diesel emmisions dramatically and improves fuel efficiency by 3%. It’s being deployed (mandated by the EPA?) in the US starting in 2010 light trucks and big rigs. Here’s a webinar description by Cummins about the technology. The webinar, and the couple other sources I found bandies about phrases like “near zero emissions” and “5% better fuel economy” “reducing NOx to near-zero levels”. It’s a bother to fill another fuel-related fluid, but the industry seems to be behind this.

Here’s a nearly worthless industry website about  Selective Catalytic Reduction.

I went to India in February 2010 to present technology and art at Techkriti. If you are American preparing to go to India, this advice will make your trip much more enjoyable.

A friend of mine, first initial “S.” is from Kanpur, the exact city we visited. How crazy is that! Here’s what I gleaned from a conversation with him about the trip. After my trip, I can say that every word turned out to be exactly true.

1. Never touch anyone’s head, not even children. Your sacredness starts at your (dirty) feet and goes to the top of your (sacred) head. So it’s a pretty sensitive spot.
2. It’s usually best to greet people by saying “Namaste”, putting your hands together in a prayer stance and bowing slightly. If they offer their hand, shake it, western style.
3. Women should wear conservative dress, high necklines, long sleeves, long dresses, nothing too flashy. She should always stay between the menfolk when walking the street lest she be propositioned endlessly. Because every white woman they’ve ever seen on the big screen has made like they wanted to have sex with them.
4. Definitely see the Gangees river AKA Gunga. You might get lucky and see a dead body burning in a boat. If you are really lucky, you might see his (still living) wife burning on the funeral pyre with him. That rarely happens… but it happens. (yow)
5. The native language of Utter Predesh is Hindi. A local speaker with a strong dialect/accent can barely be understood by a generic Hindi speaker. A lot of signs are in English but certainly not all.
6. Use your right hand for everything. It’s disrespectful to use the left.
7. If you find a local toilet, it might not have toilet paper. Or a seat. It’ll just be a hole in the ground. One option is to bring your own TP. To go local: fill the cup with water. While squatting, use your right hand to run water down your backside into your butt crack. Use your left hand to clean your butt. When finished, wash your left hand with more of the water from the cup. Now you know why Indians don’t use their left hand for anything.
8. Beggar children will approach you on the street with the best begging you’ve ever seen. Some will have missing fingers and other deformities. Don’t give them any money, ever. If you do, you’ll very quickly be surrounded by other beggar children who will make off with everything on your person. Did you see Slumdog Millionaire? It’s like that. The children’s mother probably cut off their fingers so they would get more money begging. This is the caste they are born into. S. has seen these people all his life and never given any of them any money and noone he knows has ever given them any money but they get by somehow.
9. S. has a cousin who I asked about connecting with since it’s good to have friends there “just in case”. He was willing but family wouldn’t allow it because an unmarried woman shouldn’t talk to an unmarried man, even if it’s just in email and even if it’s an emergency. Their family is a bit traditional but that is how it is there.
10. If you have a problem, call the US consulate. Locals will back off if they know the consulate might get involved.
11. In his family’s home, which is a common if slightly upscale one, when you wash dishes, the water is pumped up by hand and onto the dishes. The water falls onto the floor and into a hole in the corner, which drains to the street. The toilet drains to the same place. Yes, the alley smells as bad as you might imagine.
12. The walls of first floor are made of cow dung, the second floor is concrete, the third floor is steel and concrete. Sounds like a bad idea, right? It pretty much is. But the building is still standing.
13. There are a lot of bugs. Don’t wear shorts (it’s so “fat american tourist”). Many people in his photos wore short sleeves but we should wear long sleeves. Some of the bugs have rare uncurable diseases. Get your shots!
14. He showed me a photo of 2 people outside his house. One was warming up an iron on a coal fire he brought with him. The other was hollering up to him saying, “Send out your clothes, I’ll iron them.” This kind of thing is very common but we’d do well to stay away from such situations.
15. If you want to buy something in a store, ask the shopkeeper how much it costs. Whatever he says, counter with half as much as his offer. He’ll refuse. Scoff and start to walk out. He’ll then relent and try to bargain. Only agree to the 1/2 price. At the end, you’ll get something dirt cheap and he’ll have made more on you than he ever normally does.
16. Most common items cost nickels. Maybe 20% of what you’d pay in the US. It depends.
17. He added caviats saying the he was sorry he talked all about the bad parts and not much about the good parts. But I think if we know these parts, the good bits will take care of themself.
18. If you ask someone to go to the store and buy you shiny blue pants with gold trim, they might get you brown pants because, well they are pants! They’ll do the job. That’s how things are.
19. Bananas are a good snack. They’ll help decrease travellers diarea and they’re clean if you peel them.
20. If we’re travelling with a native, it’s good to ask them to buy the item. They’ll get a better deal and watch out for you.
21. Shopping is a bit of an angry experience. There’s posturing and dislike. People often walk into shops and holler “Hey, why doesn’t someone serve me!” And the shop keeper will be angrily nonchalant about the shopper’s anger.
22. Hospitality is huge. Our hosts will likely take VERY good care of us.

Followup: every bit of this guide was EXACTLY true.

The Fifty Percent Rule
I’m sorry, you’ll just have to ask me in person about this most amazing phenomenon.

Cell phone service

Though AT&T told me there was barely any cell phone service in the cities I was visiting, there was fantastic cell phone service all across India. There was always at least 4 providers to choose from in any spot. Of course, it cost $2.50/min for roaming. I generally used texting ($0.40) and skype/wifi/iPhone ($0.05/min) for my calls.

Driving

• You do not want to drive in India unless you have been there for a long while. It’s insane. Hire a driver.
• Gas was $4-6/gallon when it was $2.50-3.00 in the US.
• For instance, when approaching a blind intersection neither driver stops as a mater of course; instead each driver listens for the other driver’s horn and acts accordingly. Therefore, people are CONSTANTLY using their horns and barreling through intersections.
• In traffic vehicles get about 1 ft away from one another.
• Cars share the road on a pretty much 1:1 status with motorcycles having 1-3 riders, bikes with 1-3 riders, pedestrians, pony & ox carts, human powered and motorized vehicles with wildly oversized loads, and pedestrians. Oh and roaming cattle have the right of way.
• Few cars have side view mirrors and I didn’t ONCE see our driver or any other look over their shoulder.
• Bumping other vehicles is frowned on but happens (we bumped a car and bicyclist in our 20 hours of driving).
• And cars drive on the left side of the road.
• Cars have signs on their bumpers saying “PLEASE HONK”, indicating they don’t have rear view mirrors and want you to honk if you’re passing them. The din of horns is unworldly, really.

On Marriage

Last night on our way back from the taj mahal and red fort ( wow the red fort buuilt in 1600 has better fortifications than almost any European castle I’ve seen AND is more opulent inside AND is much larger inside, wow) and we were talking about marriage. Our 3 indian hosts were honestly surprised that all marriages in the US were “love marriages” and not arranged. They watch US tv all the time; they they like watching shows like Friends. In Bollywood movies most of those are love marriages… But that’s the movies.

Related posts I wrote that you should read about India

India

I have Typhoid, Hep A, Tetanus and Whooping Cough

SWARM at Techkriti, Kanpur India!